Free wood-fired hand -tossed pizza for all

The View From A Farr

I’ve been reading up on healthcare issues lately and I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m dumber than a post and have no idea what anybody’s talking about. So, let’s talk about pizza.

Pizza is round. It comes in all different flavors like pepperoni, sausage or veggie supreme with marinated tofu. If Domino’s had a Barbecued Goat Pizza on the menu, I’d try it, but they don’t, and that’s that.

It still amazes me that in this day and age, a large majority of able-bodied God Bless Americans cannot afford to buy good, quality wood-fired hand-tossed pizza, made just the way momma used to make it.

Pizza is mostly served hot. Sometimes I eat leftover pizza cold for breakfast. Many people think that’s weird. I never invite those people over to my house for pizza.

Pizza has a history dating back to nobody knows when because Pizza History is not taught in schools anymore. Quick research through the Internet tells us that pizza was a poor man’s meal, brought to America by Italian immigrants who turned it into a multi-billion dollar industry in 30 minutes or less.

Nobody knows who first hand tossed pizza dough. It could have been two Italian brothers, Vito and Sal, fighting over their godmother’s recipe. Sal won the fight and Vito went into insurance. I’m just guessing here because, again, nobody knows.

Sometimes it seems that Congress was invented so politically-oriented individuals could spend a ton of money getting elected, then go off to Washington and enjoy free wood-fired hand-tossed pizza for all nationally-elected people. Of course when they get sick from eating all that pizza, they take the afternoon off and go visit their doctor, then head straight to bed until their wittle-bitty woodfired hand-tossed tummies feel a whole lot better.

The rest of us, when our wittle-bitty tummies feel bad, we suck down whatever’s in our medicine cabinet and hope it doesn’t kill us – because who among us can afford to miss a day of work due to dying frivolously?

But I digress a wittle bit.

Pizza is usually delivered by young people just trying to make ends meet in order to stay in college and get good-paying jobs so they can enjoy the premium woodfired hand-tossed pizza and not have to settle for the Wal-Mart-brand frozen pizza that either doesn’t get crispy on the bottom or burns to a cinder long before it’s time.

I believe those college students, along with every other God Bless American, would jump for joy if Congress afforded us the right to free quality wood-fired hand-tossed pizza for all. I’m not trying to make a political statement here, but you know what I’m talking about.

In conclusion, I have concluded that only the rich can afford “the good stuff.” But does it have to be that way? Are the rest of us doomed to eating rolled-out “could-be pepperoni but I have my doubts” pizza slapped on cardboard and wrapped in plastic with a best-eaten-by date of sometime early last year?

I think not!

We demand free quality wood-fired hand-tossed pizza, I say!

Free pizza for all!

Mount Pleasant Tribune

PO Box 1177
Mount Pleasant TX 75456